A LESSON IN LOVE By Lori A Alicea

In any given day;

We are teachers.
We are students.

With our lives, we are teaching a class, most likely never realizing the students who are observing, listening and taking notes.

People are watching us.
We are watching them.

There are classrooms assembled everywhere we go.
Sometimes we’re the student.
Sometimes we’re the teacher.

Our lives take center stage and people are wondering, studying and silently asking questions.

The question is though:
What lessons are we teaching?

On October 15, 2019 David and I will be celebrating 25 years of marriage. So hard to believe that this wonderful man comes home every night and parks his car next to mine in the driveway where we live.  He chooses to sit beside me at the dinner table.  He chooses to hold my hand whenever we are close enough to do so.  He chooses to call me periodically throughout the day.  He chooses to love me and call me his wife.  After twenty five years, I choose him and all of this and more.

I am a blessed woman.
My husband tells me every day what a blessed man he is.

Our marriage is a gift from God.

To celebrate this milestone, we have decided to live out this amazing legacy before our grandchildren, displaying the faithfulness of God through our twenty five years together in a Wedding Vow Renewal Event. Sparing no sparkle, we have gathered our children, grandchildren, family and dear friends around the dinner table for an evening to remember.

With both of us being once divorced, we desperately wanted the generations going forward to inherit a glorious picture of marriage, framed in Godly love.

Though our twenty five years together have encountered its share of misgivings, David and I celebrate a deep affection and unbreakable bond for one another, and desire that our marriage live beyond us as:

a testimony,
a vision of hope rooted in God,
a lesson in love.

…a cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Ecclesiastes 4:12

Interestingly, when David and I were just newlyweds all those years ago, still learning about each other, still learning how to blend our families. I remember a man I met on the job who had no idea when he punched in the time clock that morning, he’d be teaching me an impressionable  Lesson in Love,

teaching a student watching, observing, listening and taking notes.

Ironically, I punched the time clock that morning to be the teacher, to instruct him and the crew how to use a newly installed system.

Yes, the classroom doors are always open.
Some days we’re the teacher.
Some days we’re the student.

This particular day twenty five years ago I was the student, getting a valuable

LESSON IN LOVE
By Lori A. Alicea    

After celebrating Valentine’s Day just a few weeks ago and June fast approaching with summer weddings, surely love is in the air for many.  Though a romantic that I believed myself to be, it was after being hired to teach a class where a lesson in true love was unsuspectingly being prepared for me.

I was working the grueling midnight shift in the steel mill one year, teaching workers how to use a newly installed system, when I was introduced to “Frank”.

Initially after meeting “Frank”, I questioned whether our personalities would click.  “Frank” was often cranky when things went wrong, yet lightened up later with an offering from his candy dish.  “Frank” was tall and full of energy, though humorously odd when answering the phone.

It was quiet that night, as work had halted earlier, leaving “Frank” and I alone to keep watch.  To pass the hour, “Frank” had brewed some coffee, inviting me to join.

“Frank” looked comfortable around this makeshift kitchen, finding comforts of home behind a locked cabinet of his.  “Frank” must have been a waiter in an earlier day, as he displayed this natural ability to serve.

It’s sad thinking you know a person by believing what you see, instead of what you’ve learned.  You wonder how many friendships never bloom, when opposites sometimes fail to give it a chance, even over something simple as a cup of coffee.

As “Frank” began to unwind that evening, I slowly noticed him different.  Maybe he made a good impression with the table he set.  Or maybe I just realized how easy “Frank” was to talk to.

In the beginning, conversation between “Frank” and I was small talk.  Before long though, “Frank” was sharing about the love of his life.

“14 years ago everything changed”, “Frank” said, when the woman he married got sick; she’s been sick every since.  Over coffee “Frank” took me down the streets of memory lane, visiting sites of pain and sorrow, yet stopping by to smell their roses of happiness.   That night “Frank” exposed the scars of their travels, yet vowed he’d marry her all over again.

Yes “Frank” believed everything changed 14 years ago, but I believe “Frank” forgot what didn’t change, his wedding vows, “in sickness and in health”.

That night I met a man who didn’t change, when everything around him did.  “Frank” didn’t leave when his wife needed him most.  “Frank” continued to serve, when eyes often didn’t see.  That night I met a man who honored “I Take Thee, in spite of sickness.”  That night over coffee I met a new found friend; that night I met man.

IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH By Lori A Alicea

… I take thee,
To have and to hold from this day forward,
For better or for worse,
For richer, for poorer,
In sickness and in health,
To love and to cherish,
From this day forward,
Until….

Our wedding vows;

Our sacred promises we speak from the deepest well of our soul, vowing to one another for life and before God on our wedding day.

Our heart’s oath spoken at a holy altar, promising to love and to cherish thee thru whatever comes our way, from this day forward, until…

Weddings are an exquisite “painting of a thousand words.”

Details too many for a single sentence, fill up a bride’s journal as she displays her heart in the volumes of pages.

Wedding couples experience a whirl wind of excitement in the months prior of  planning and preparation. They are overcome by euphoria when a fairy tale comes to life on their wedding day.  Sometimes though the wedding hype overshadows the sacredness and life-long commitment they are making during their marriage ceremony that a couple’s wedding vows might be glossed over as mere words mirrored back when the minister states, “Repeat after me”.

Long after the wedding dress is dry-cleaned and the thank-you cards have all been mailed, reality returns and life begins for two people who promised to

Have and to hold each other, from this day forward,
Until….

Life begins and life happens.

Real life isn’t the picture perfect moments posed and portrayed in your wedding album. Yes, married life is beautiful, wonderful and worth it all.  Speaking from a marriage kissed by God, we will celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary this October.

But in real life you can’t photo shop the disagreements, the misunderstandings, the unexpected bills, the attitudes and the mundane weeks.

The hardships of real life tests your heart’s commitment to those wedding vows
For better or for worse,
Until…

It’s easy to stay married
In the better,
In the richer,
In the health,
And in the love.

Baring the extreme and justifiable circumstances, many couples give up on marriage because they have created a back door called “Until…”

They stay until
The better becomes worse,
The rich becomes poor,
The health becomes sickness,
The love becomes unlovely.

 Yet marriages surviving a lifetime are committed in the “until…”

Lasting marriages dig their heels in the tough times until
They lock arms in the “drought seasons of not enough” until
They wage war and fight thru battles of sickness, loving and holding on to each other until…
They love without condition no matter how unlovely until…
A man and woman committed in the until…
Stand as one
until….
death they do part.

Forty-plus years ago my brother married his high school sweetheart. They met and fell in love at a youth sponsored roller skating event and have been together ever since.

Forty-plus years ago my brother and his high school sweetheart stood at an old fashioned altar and vowed:

To have and to hold each other from this day forward,
For better or for worse,
For richer, for poorer,
In sickness and in health,
To love and to cherish,
From this day forward,
Until….

 My brother and his wife have enjoyed true love in marriage, though encountering their share of ups and downs.
They have rejoiced in the good times as well as the bad.
They have known plenty. They have known lack.
But through it all, I’ve never seen them more committed.

The back door of escape called until doesn’t exist in their house.
Especially when you witness them honoring their vows of

 In sickness and in health.

 Both have known serious sickness.
Sadly, sickness still wages war on their health yet they remain standing firm on the front lines, fighting for life today.
Both rejoice and hold tight to their unshakeable faith that God still heals and keeps his promises.
2019 houle mark and connie rainbowTo speak with them by telephone or by text, you leave the conversation more uplifted as they are the ones encouraging you.
2019 houle mark and connieA true testimony of love and courage in the until…

The hardships of real life tests your heart’s commitment to those wedding vows
For better or for worse.

 That bride and groom who remain in the trenches and fight those battles which wage war for their marriage,

Together will always see the better in the worse,
Will feel richer in the poor,
Will experience health in the sickness,
Will know true love to cherish,
From this day forward,
While staying committed in the
until….

love is…..By Lori A Alicea

Twenty-five years ago this October while vowing love and commitment to one another at our wedding altar, my husband and I received mined gold pieces of wisdom spoken by our Pastor, a compass he gave us to discovering love for a lifetime.

Our Pastor encouraged us as “bride and groom” embarking on a lifetime journey together to love, respect, honor, enjoy and revere the other with our eyes. To see goodness, uniqueness, virtue, value, future, beauty and wonderment in the other,

A mining for love in the noticing.

The eyes see it all; the good, the bad, the ugly.
We have a choice.

Each and every day we have a choice; to see the bad, to see the ugly.
Or notice the good hidden in the corner of your eye.
The good is always there.

Don’t look away. You’ll miss it.
Take a second look if you have to.
Don’t miss an opportunity to
mine for love in the noticing.

True love isn’t riches measured in dollars and cents.
True love is captured in the pause of a long stare, between blinks in a given moment. True love is in the eye of the beholder.

True love is mined in the noticing.

Life is full of beauty.
NOTICE IT.
Notice the bumble bee,
the small child,
and the smiling faces.
Smell the rain and feel the wind.
Life your life to the fullest potential,
and fight for your dreams.
Ashley Smith

Love is in the simple.
Love is in the day to day.
Love looks for it.
Love searches for it.

Love is always there.
Love is mining in the noticing.

Love is eyes lighting up.
Love is falling in love with my husband over and over when I notice him:

Making the bed in the morning or turning the covers at night.

Deciding it is his responsibility to tackle the sink full of dishes after meals.

Ironing better than any dry cleaners in town.

Unashamed to fall to his knees in prayer.

Calling my mother or visiting her on his own without me.

Endearing my mother by referring to her as mom.

Hauling the basket of dirty laundry to the basement then bringing up the clean and folded clothes unassumingly.

Wearing cologne at all times; after showers, before bed or for no reason at all.

Lathering our little grandsons with cologne so they can smell like Papa too.

Smiling because every Facetime call from our grandchildren begins with,
“Where’s Papa?”

Always treating and referring to my children as “our children” from day one.

Full of grease after working on the car in all the weather elements regardless of having no garage.

Reaching the heavens and hearts with his voice in song.

Revealing his gorgeous smile.

Laughing for every little thing.

Revisiting a conversation when customers have inquired about his no-show whereabouts after making such a lasting impression of courtesies and promptness.

Setting the dinner table standard of eating whatever my hands have prepared; even during the early years when my attempts at Porter Rican rice resembled oatmeal to our children’s gag-reflexing dismay.

Revealing his heart through sensitive tears; especially when they fall regarding his kids and grandkids.

Holding my hand throughout our 25 years of life together;
while in the car,
while watching TV,
while drinking coffee together,
while lying in bed at night.

Love isn’t a feeling.
Love isn’t a fairy tale.
Love is a choice.
Love chooses to see the good in a bad day.

Love can be for a lifetime.

Love remembers that:

Love never fails…..
1 Corinthians 13: 8 NIV

When
Love is mining in the noticing.

Love just is.

THE WIFE OF YOUR YOUTH By Lori A Alicea

Dearest to my heart, dearest to everything I hold true is the joy of sharing a lifetime with that special someone created and chosen especially for you.

The thought of two people walking together side by side and cleaving to one another for life is a love story captured in a

Painting of a thousand words”,

A portrait passed and hung on the walls of the generations for their reminder of the heart of God depicted on canvas,

18 May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
P
roverbs 5:18 NIV
looking out of water 1
We’ve all been alone some time in our life.

In our “aloneness”, surely there’s been that longing for someone to share our hopes with, someone to share our dreams.

In our “aloneness”, surely there’s been that longing for a shoulder to cry on, someone to dry our tears.

In our “aloneness”, surely we didn’t want to be alone forever.
looking-out-of-window.jpgEven God himself said,
18 “It is not good for the man to be alone.
I
will make a helper suitable for him.”
Genesis 2:18 NIV

 The first love story ever written,

God took the man’s rib and formed his soul mate for which the man called her “bone of his bone”.  (Genesis 2:23 NIV)

22Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.  Genesis 2:22 NIV
first looks
In whose purpose is to protect one’s delicate heart, a beautiful love story written in the smallest of details when God chose a rib to complete the “aloneness” of a man.

Walking together side by side “for whatever comes their way”,
first walkCarrying with them their

Painting of a thousand words”,

Cleaving to one another and unearthing the hidden treasure of God’s heart revealed from their life together “one step at a time”,

18 May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
Proverbs 5:18 NIV

Love stories are inspired words authored and written on paper.

Love stories are the overflow of one’s heart, spilling onto the pages of that soulmate we cling to.
writing letterLove stories come to life and can be read “between the lines” of a smile.swingLove stories can be witnessed in the carefree spirit of the
“Wife of Your Youth.”
swing 1
Love stories face each other as they face their future together,
are you readyFor whatever comes their way,
For better or worse.
Remembering that nothing can stand between,
nor tear apart,
or come against,
two people united in love.
signing licenseEspecially when your love story is depicted in a
“Portrait of a thousand words”,
looking out of water 1
A love story inspired and written by God.

 

A NEW BEGINNING By Lori A Alicea

As a faithful friend who keeps his solemn promises, morning greets us each and every day with a kiss of new beginnings.

 New beginnings that promise a “blank page” if you dare to write the next chapter.
New beginnings that promise another “chance” if you dare to try.
New beginnings that promise “hope” if you dare to dream.
New beginnings that promise “life” if you dare to breathe.
New beginnings that promise “friendship” if you dare to be a friend.
New beginnings that promise another “race” if you dare to lace up your shoes.
New beginnings that promise a “song” if you dare to sing.
New beginnings that promise “relationship” if you dare to forgive.
New beginnings that promise “love” if you dare to open your heart.
New beginnings that promise “the moon” if you dare to shoot for the stars.

New beginnings that promise a “kiss”
If you dare to kiss back.

New beginnings are birthed with new promises, all yours for the taking.
Do you see them?
Do you look for them?
Do you want them?
girls looking out windowThe author of our yesterday, today and forever;
our beginning, and our end (Revelation 22:13 NIV)
is the author of our new beginnings,
the author of another day.

Might we be encouraged to take the dare of a new beginning?
Might we take our blank page and write the words we wanted our life to say yesterday?
What do you have to lose?

Our faithful God is a “God of Second Chances; everyday”.
His mercies and compassion’s are new every morning;
a clean slate for us to try again.

22  …for his compassion’s never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23 NIV

Might we dare to walk the “high wire” of a new beginning risking the fall for the promise, relying on the “safety net of your father’s arms to fall into” if something does go wrong.
Aubrey touching papa's face

For I have always been mindful of your unfailing love
and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness.
Psalm 26:3 NIV       

Be confident in taking the next step of your new beginning without the security of yesterday’s training wheels.
Your Father’s got you.
Kyle teaching Ethan to ride a bike

You’re not alone in this world of new beginnings, your Father sees you.
Ayva in car seat
Allow your Father to sing over you,
To remind you:
“You’re everything he hoped for.”
“You’re everything he dreamed.”
Joe Cocker

 

 

 

Song YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL
by Joe Cocker

“Today” is that faithful friend who keeps his solemn promises, like morning who greets us each and every day with a kiss of new beginnings.

But new beginnings come with a dare.

YOU MUST

Dare to try.
Dare to dream.
Dare to breathe.
Dare to be a friend.
Dare to run your race.
Dare to sing your song.
Dare to forgive.
Dare to love.

Dare to kiss back.

New beginnings are birthed with new promises.
You must see them.
You must look for them.
You must want them.
You must reach for them to take them.

You must Dare to kiss back.