DISTRACTIONS OF THE DREAMER By Lori A Alicea

Pastor Chuck Lawrence was once quoted as saying.

If the enemy cannot destroy the DREAM…

He will try and DISTRACT the DREAMER

 How true these words really are, more than most of us know or willing to believe, including me.

We each are gifted to run our race, pressing toward the goal and prize for which God has called every one of us.

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:14 NIV 

We are not to be distracted by turning to the left or right, but fixing our gaze and eyes straight ahead, continuing to stay in our lane for which we are called.

 

25Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you.

26Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways.

27Do not turn to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil.

Proverbs 4:25-27 NIV

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But that is the strategy of the enemy.  He knows he is rendered powerless to destroy our God given dream, so the enemy will unpack his arsenal of distractions to lure us from the straight and narrow path we are called to run in and lead us down the detours of the left and right.

The enemy is a liar and a deceiver.  He enticed and distracted Eve with an apple in the garden she was forbidden to eat by God; something so delicious to her eyes, she couldn’t help herself and fell into his trap.  (Genesis 3)

The enemy’s distractions are unique to each of us; our job is to follow God’s plan of our calling, looking neither to the left or right and becoming increasingly aware of his distractions.

Looking back through the pages of my personal journal of writing, I realize I indeed have played into the enemy’s hand of distraction to my dream.

I became enticed at an early elementary age with my love affair with words.  I felt God’s calling to write, however that would look, yet not having a mentor to guide me in my innocent years would prove to be a stumbling block for me and an open door to the enemy’s distractions.

Poetry and short stories were my favorite and couldn’t wait to hand in my work to the teachers during our creative writing sessions.  Yet to my confusion, I began receiving F’s written in bright red markers on my papers, charging me with coping and plagiarizing some other author’s work.

An elementary age girl in tears does not know how to handle such rejection, nor does she realize the enemy sent a distraction of giving up on writing after receiving these failing grades on her poetry and short stories.

This first distraction didn’t detour me from writing though, as my love for God and the special dream He had planted in my heart and my love affair for words were stronger.

Many years would go by, yet I continued to compose poetry inside greeting cards, but that was the extent of it as I married and had two small children to rear.

But later in my thirties, I decided to take a leap of faith and offer my column writing skills to the family section of a local 10,000 subscription newspaper, for which they accepted.  I couldn’t believe the open door of opportunity I was granted, yet this door would close eight months later.

Another distraction of rejection from the enemy to say, “I didn’t have what it takes to write.”  Another lie from the enemy, because God has gifted us perfectly, so we should cast aside the doubts of our inadequacy or “not good enough” attitude, as God has packed our tool-belt of talents according to our ability, which should bring us comfort to know God has called us and placed a dream in our hearts to run with passion and win the prize.

 

And unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one; to every man according to his several ability…
Matthew 25:15 KJV

 

Always remember the lure of the enemy’s distractions can play to our desires, as the apple did to Eve in the garden.

Years ago, the distraction of Event Decorating enticed me to leave my lane of writing, causing me veer to the left for the next two decades. I was always aware of the pen calling me back home to pick it back up again to write, but my love for glitter and glam of decorating tables kept me terribly distracted, even though I knew my dream awaited me with an undivided heart.

I couldn’t do both.

My writing didn’t stop during this twenty-year period of distraction though, as I was faithful for over six years to author this blog, yet I always knew these were mere crumbs to the full meal God wanted me to prepare for my readers.

This February of 2024 was a defining moment for me when God lovingly displayed himself in a tangible way back to the pen and paper of writing.

Having coffee with a dear friend at our favorite place in town, she revealed how God wanted me to have this check now held in her hands, to replace the computer He already knew was holding its last breath of life and replace it to begin writing those books I wanted to leave as part of my legacy.

My friend had no idea about the health of my computer, yet God did and confirmed that wonderful dream again He revealed to me as an elementary child.

To have an undivided heart in writing, I had to leave the detour of my distraction of Event Decorating, giving away any reminders, including all glitter and glam.

This was freeing and I was ready.

Lord, forgive me for wasting so much time down this path of distraction.

My brand-new computer arrived but not without another distraction from the enemy, a distraction and challenge in my health.

Severe back pain and digestive issues I have never experienced before in my six decades of life, makes it terribly painful to sit for more than minutes at a time. While under doctor and chiropractor care, healing is at a snails pace.

Do I give into the enemy’s distraction of pain and stop writing as that is his strategy, or do I persevere in my calling as the following Pastor did in his distraction of pain, a testimony I heard on a Focus on the Family broadcast many years prior.

 

In January of 1990, Pastor Duane Miller of a Baptist congregation in Brenham, Texas, full of calling to preach and sing at his small church in Texas, awoke with the flu, making it painful to speak and breathe, as if someone had a grip on his throat.  Eventually the flu disappeared, but his voice was reduced to a raspy whisper, rendering him unable to preach and sing, leaving him no other option but to resign from his congregation in Brenham, Texas.

Over the next three years, Miller was examined by 63 physicians, each giving him a prognosis to recover of zero.

Because of Miller’s inability to speak, he was unable to work in the private sector, and insurance stopped covering his treatments, leaving him thousands of dollars in medical bills.

During this time, Miller’s former Sunday school class at First Baptist Church of Houston asked him to teach their class, raspy voice and all, as a special love for their Pastor and his teaching, who missed him terribly.

Undistracted with his voice, Pastor Duane continued to follow his passion to teach.  How interesting on one particular Sunday school class, Pastor Duane was preaching on healing.

During the scratching teaching of his lesson, Pastor Duane received a miracle from God with a complete healing of his voice, which returned to him in front of the class.  This miracle can be heard in real time on the audio.

The class erupted in tears and song for the miracle the Lord had just performed, giving all glory and honor to God.

We each have a choice to live undistracted and focus on the prize set before us.  Or waste time of years and decades to the enticements of the distractions set before us.

I was blessed a few weeks ago to hear Megan Tibbits play the harp on social media to the song she authored titled, Undistracted.

 

Her song is an anthem to all runners in the race of their calling, to run Undistracted, finishing the work we each have been called to complete.

Megan Tibbits
Song Undistracted
(a few words of the lyrics)

Verse 2

So I will lift my eyes and focus

Focus on the prize

Finishing the work that I, I started in the world surprise,

The small, small beginning.

Chorus

So I will choose to live

Undistracted…

At the end of the day, one must beg the question,

“What is the enemy so afraid of that he constantly bombards our paths with distractions?”

 

Because he doesn’t want us to complete our assignment, our calling, our God given dream and make a difference in the lives of others, giving all the glory back to God.

These distractions have never been about us, but about magnifying and illuminating the majesty of our wonderful God, for which the enemy can’t stand.

So, in the midst of our distractions, we still have power over the enemy when calling on Jesus’ name.

We are called to submit to God, resist the devil, and he will flee.  Amen!

Submit yourselves, then, to God.  Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
James 4:7 NIV

THE UNNOTICED By Lori A Alicea

I wish I would have read a few chapters of his story before I judged the cover of his book, an unkempt house in disarray.

It’s so easy to look on the outside of someone’s life and think their story has already been told and revealed through the pages our limited eyes can see.

If only I could rewind the clock a few years when I became his neighbor and begin from Chapter 1, befriend and get to know this unnoticed person in our community and discover compassion for a rundown man in his seventies who just needed someone to notice him.

Word has it my neighbor was once an accomplished individual in his younger years, yet his addiction with alcohol affected his diabetic health and relationship with his children over time.

Which explains why I rarely notice any visits or sightings from family with their father and grandfather; I suppose that would have been explained in Chapter 10 titled Father Wounds.

Even more devastating is to witness my neighbor a few doors down needing a walker to assist himself out of the car and maneuver the steps of his deck to enter his house, painfully walking on swollen and wrapped up legs covered in sores.  One day I caught him struggling to bring the laundry basket in, for which I ran over to offer a helping hand, yet he wouldn’t allow me to enter his home.

This past summer my husband David began cutting our neighbor’s yard and bringing some hints of life back into his home, even if only on the outside and cover of his book.

I sent over a few meals with David, who had earned the trust of this unnoticed man by caring for him in the small ways where he was unable, allowing David a moment of small conversation inside his home with a man who was desperate to be loved and noticed.

Being unable to care for the lawn and upkeep with his limited mobility, followed into the inside as well, as David noticed the floor littered debris down the hall from the front door where he stood conversing with our neighbor relaxing in his recliner.

We loved and served bringing light and hope to this unnoticed man, longing to make a difference.  Yet, because neither one of us has known addiction, we should have kept reading his story, uncovering his pain that we could come along side of him in a deeper and more meaningful way.

But last summer our neighbor began to have a new spring in his step, a smile on his face when we noticed a young lady in her thirties was given room and board in exchange for the upkeep of his house and trips to the doctor.

Our neighbor’s assistant was most appreciative of David’s help of mowing and pulling weeds, a woman noticing someone else, when I would come to realize in time, we should have been noticing her.

For the next six months our unnoticed friend seemed to emerge from the wallpaper he had blended from in his surroundings, being noticed even by a few.

The other day I was walking the sidewalks of my neighborhood and noticed my neighbor arriving home a few minutes prior.  A small cloud of sadness hung over him for which I inquired about.

Holding the broken pieces of his heart in his words, he conveyed his little girl was gone.” Oh no, you lost your daughter, I replied.”

No, the woman who was assisting him had died from a drug overdose of heroin.  Even more devastating, his little girl died at his feet on the living room floor, who tried to revive her with a spray for overdoses, but to no avail.  His little girl was taken away by ambulance in a cold and sterile body bag.

All the condolences from me were empty words for the unbearable pain my neighbor was feeling.  The emptiness of the house returns and back into the wallpaper of his surroundings will receive this unnoticed man once again.

If I would have kept reading his story, Chapter 11 titled Addicts attract Addicts would have given me insight to pursue these two unnoticed souls trapped in their bondages of addiction and pain.  But never experiencing or knowing anyone struggle in this way, I could have never known.

I wish I would have read a few chapters of his story before I judged the cover of his book of an unkempt house three years ago when we moved into this neighborhood.

It’s so easy to look on the outside of someone’s life and think their story has already been told and revealed through the pages our limited eyes can see.

They say when you know better you do better.

Lord, help me to pursue in a deeper way the unnoticed.

The chapters of their story unveil the valleys, the mountain tops, the successes and failures.

We just have to be willing the open their book and read.

GETTING MARRIED…Thoughtfully consider your vows By Lori A Alicea

June is fast approaching and the wedding season for many brides who have dreamed about this day since she was a little girl is inching ever so close to the printed date and time on her wedding invitation.

No doubt these blushing brides have already said, “Yes, to the dress”, whether simple yet elegant, trimmed in sparkle and beads, a flowing train or not.  Whatever her choice, these beautiful women will surely stand out among the garden of flowers and starry skies of candlelight and take center stage with all eyes on her as she gracefully takes her royal walk down the rose petal isle to her betrothed.

Weddings are beautiful and magical and are unique to the personalities of the bride and groom.

One could get lost in the grand details displayed in every corner of the church, yet the part of the ceremony I lean in close and intently listen to is the exchange of their wedding vows by two people pledging their love for the other for a lifetime; especially if they are handwritten by the bride and groom.

I’ve often encouraged brides and grooms to carefully consider their vows, letting the overflow of their heart be voiced before a church seated with witnesses whose role is to remind them what they spoke and pledged before the other and before God long after the wedding church doors have been closed.

I’ve also encouraged couples to memorialize their vows in a frame and hang in a place to remind them for the days and years to come when circumstances challenge a couple’s love, so their commitments are in full view of what they promised at the altar before God when those seasons of hard times present themselves through the front door.

Weddings are only for a day.

The clock will soon strike midnight, a bride’s gown will find its way back into the box, the tuxedos will be returned, and the garden of fresh flowers will surely wilt.

But marriages are for a lifetime.

The first beginnings of marriage take place when a newly married couple steps into their happily ever.

Looking back at our wedding day almost thirty years ago this October, you think the details would remain fresh in your mind, but sadly they don’t.  Yet, I’m thankful for the photographs and videos which take you back and rewind the clock and bring into full view again our Cinderella Day as if it was yesterday.

But as I encourage new couples about to be married, our vows spoken to the other have been written down for our reminders even thirty years after our wedding on Sweetest Day.

These are my husband’s vows to me.

My love, my words can’t express how much you mean to me.

From the first time I met you

My love for you is immense.

I thank the Lord; he heard my prayers.

You are so special to me.

I promise to love you with all my heart.

And lift you up when you are down.        

I’ll fill your life with happiness as much as I can.

I will never leave you.           

I’ll always be by your side.

You are the joy of my life.

From the first time I met you, I will always love you.

Lori my love, take me as I am.

I give you all of me.

I thank the Lord for you.

My husband David has kept his promises to me and just as he reminded at the altar that day thirty years ago…

My love for you is immense.

Truly, he has cherished me in ways like no other, adding though the love from my Heavenly Father.

These past few months though, another excerpt from my husband’s pledge has been magnified in our home…

I promise to love you with all my heart.

And lift you up when you are down.

 With a few minor health challenges causing me setbacks I have never experienced before; David has been beyond faithful to his vows to…

Lift you up when you are down.

 Coming home from a hard day’s work, David takes over those tasks I was unable to complete in my day; dishes, vacuuming, laundry, whatever it may be, serving without complaining or me asking; he just lifts me up when I am down.

 Words are containers for life or death as we are reminded…

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who live it will eat its fruit.
Proverbs 18:21 NIV

 For those getting married, thoughtfully consider your vows…

At the altar of your lifetime moment on that glorious day you have waited forever for, speak life to the one you are betrothed to, as your words remain alive even thirty years after your memories and photographs are memorialized into its keepsake wedding book.

HER PRINCESS PLACE By Lori A Alicea

There’s a secret hidden place in every princess who longs to belong.

A place she will never tell you about, a place she keeps all to herself, yet you can see it in her gaze when she glances up into your face as she only has eyes for you.

You see it in her eyes when you walk through the door in the afternoon and a smile radiates the room as she jumps into your embrace and wraps her arms around your neck because she’s missed you all day and now glad you’re home.

Yes, you sense her princess place during your evening ritual together before bed; tucking her snugly under the covers, saying prayers and a kiss to last until morning.

There’s no denying, your princess only has eyes for you.

Her princess place of belonging wants you to notice when she’s wearing her prettiest dress of bows and sparkle which sweeps and swooshes when she walks, she wants to take your breath away with her hair of dancing ringlets and makeup which highlights the windows of her soul and smile.

  You sense her princess place captured in a frozen memory side by side together in all her beauty just for your noticing, a framed picture she’ll remember forever and keep this moment hidden in her princess place way beyond her innocent years.

Your princess loves to dance and perform for you on her very own stage, vying for your undivided attention to cheer and to clap in your approval of her.

Hand in hand your princess will follow you to the ends of the earth as she only wants to be where you are.  She loves those unexpected trips to the hardware store, to the grocery store, even getting gas for the car; it never matters as long as you both are hand in hand together.

Never stray too far as your princess is waiting at the window for your return.

Yes, there’s a princess place in every little girl who longs to belong.

A place she will never tell you about, a place she keeps all to herself, yet a secret haven in her heart your princess wants to desperately share with you, her daddy.

There’s such a small window of time when it’s just the two of you.

You are her one and only, her knight and shining armor, a princess safely cocooned in your heart where butterflies’ sleep awaiting her wings.

Her princess place is that innocent longing for you to notice her when she’s looking your way, when she dresses up and twirls in her prettiest ball gown ready for you to escort her to the dance.

Her princess place is her yearning to be with you, wherever no matter the place, as long as you both are together to enjoy this gift of memories you’ve been given, remembering how fleeting the moments swiftly pass in your brief window of time, if you decide to leave her behind.

Her princess place reminds you to sense the waking butterfly cocooned in your heart whose wings will one day take her away from that place of just the two of you.

There’s a great big world out there for her to discover, and her wings will take her to the moon and back when your window of time is opened to set your butterfly free.

Until then daddy, cherish the princess who only has eyes for you.  Don’t take for granted her princess place reserved especially for the only man in her life.

You are molding and making a princess fully alive with your attention and approval of her.

Butterflies need wings to fly; oh, be the one to bless your princess with hers.

ALL THAT REMAINS By Lori A Alicea

IT IS WRITTEN…

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like the shifting shadows.
James 1:17 NIV

Yes, the abundant blessings in our life have all been given to us handpicked by God.

close up photo of gift boxes with greeting card
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

THE LORD GIVETH…

Our houses, our cars, our jobs, our successes and talents are all gifts from God.

Yet it’s easy to take ownership of our worldly possessions and accomplishments with statements like these…

“It is I who went to college.  It is I who works a good paying job to pay for the extravagant things we enjoy.”

Yet God reminds…

But remember the Lord your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your ancestors, as it is today.
Deuteronomy 8:18 NIV

“It is my talent and giftedness which allowed me to compete in sports, author those books, sing those songs, or dance in those recitals.”

God still reminds…

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms.
1 Peter 4:10 NIV

 Even our children are a gift from the Lord.

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from Him.
Psalms 127:3 NLT             

Yes, every good and perfect gift is from God who owns it all; we are just stewards and managers of what a generous God has given.

Such was a man in the Bible named Job who expressed his devotion to God for the many gifts of prosperity and family He bestowed in his life.

THE LORD TAKETH…

There are times in our lives though when the unfortunate and unexpected happens.

We lose our job and financial security.

We can’t pay for our homes and cars anymore.

An injury keeps us from playing sports.

Our talents find themselves compromised.

Abandoned in my first marriage thirty-five years ago, my young children and I sadly moved from a quiet country home sitting on two acres and relocated to a government subsidized housing apartment in the noisy city.  Months after moving in, I lost my job for the entire summer.

After thirty years of loyal employment, my husband David’s workplace closed its doors forever.  David didn’t work for over a year.

As a decorated runner in high school who also competed in college and ran for pleasure beyond his academic days, our son recently fractured his ankle surfing and questions if he’ll ever be able to run like he once did.

Our grandson Ethan was benched for most of his baseball season this past summer for reasons beyond our understanding.  He was drafted, attended all practices and games and yet, still benched inning after inning.

When we find ourselves stripped of our identity, our possessions, our financial security, and examine all that remains, do we discover that God is still enough?

When we remember that all our gifts were God’s anyway, are we willing to hold out our hand and give them back to Him as He sees fit?

God allowed Job’s faith to be tested by allowing the enemy to strip him of his riches, his livelihood, his children and his health.

Yet, when upon examination of Job’s life of all that remained, God was still enough when Job is quoted…

…The Lord gave me what I had, and the Lord has taken it away.
Praise the name of the Lord.

In all of this, Job did not sin by blaming God.

Job 1:20-21 NIV

THE LORD REDEEMS…

It’s difficult in times of pain and heartache to see the greater and glorious-good with what God is doing in our loss.  We’re blind to see how suffering can bring us to our knees, humble and draw us closer unto Him.

Yet we know in scripture…

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28 NIV

God truly does redeem.

After five long lonely years as a single mother, God redeemed my life and my children with a God-fearing man whom we have loved for over thirty years.

My husband David learned a new trade and is earning a salary he would have never received from his former place of employment.

God reminded to us as grandparents who grieved while watching our grandson warm the bench for an entire season, that though the coaches may have set our grandson aside, God was setting him apart.  While we don’t know the full meaning of these comforting words, God was turning it all around for our grandson’s good.

And what about Job…

10…the Lord made him prosperous again and gave him twice as much as he had before.

 12The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the first…

 13He had seven sons and three daughters.

 16Job lived a hundred and forty years; he saw his children and their children to the fourth generation.  And so he died, old and full of years.

Job 42:10, 12, 13, 16

Yes, the Lord giveth…

The Lord taketh…

But our good God always redeems…

We are to use all that God has blessed us with for His Glory.

In all that remains, we are to open our hands when He has need of what we hold onto.

Turning them all into praise as in the excerpt of this song…

BLESSED BE YOUR NAME
By Matt Redman
(An excerpt)

Every blessing You pour out,
I’ll turn back to praise.
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say.

Blessed by the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name.
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name.

WHAT THE HEART REMEMBERS By Lori A Alicea

That season in our family’s life so many years ago seemed like the longest day in summer; the season when the sunset took its time to fall asleep way beyond our grandchildren’s bedtime hour.

You never want to rush the days and years we’ve been given with our loved ones as God would have us treasure in our hands those moments with them as time is ever fleeting, even during your longest day in summer.

Our long goodbye with stepfather Roger being robbed of his memory with Alzheimer’s stretched from one year crossing over onto the next.  We loved him every day during this never-ending day of summer, biding good-bye over and over to another facet of Roger we loved and didn’t want to let go of, but such is the thief we were contending with.

Roger married our mother during a time in her life she never imagined finding love again, and now she finally had someone to share her heart and grow old together with.

Roger was a gift and completed the portrait of family we hung in the gallery of our hearts, taking also the empty seat by my mother at the senior table reserved for those pillars we held in high honor and esteem.

   Only one street separated Lot 232 and Lot 311 where mom and Roger and David and I enjoyed being neighbors.  Secretly, we moved nearby to keep watch over them in their golden years, not realizing their true need of care in years to come.

Until then, mom and Roger loved being newlyweds, frequenting their favorite places on date nights; Broadway Café, Rosewood and Around the Clock where they were both known by name.

Never answering their cell phones, if you ever needed to find them, you’d catch them at one of their hangouts enjoying dinner together, with Roger wearing the biggest smile and spaghetti on his face as he truly loved to eat.

Our longest day of summer caught us off guard and vied for our attention in the subtle of ways.

Roger’s driving became a concern to those as passengers, especially watching him maneuver around the park’s pond when we were afraid, he would drive into instead of around.

At times, Roger would stumble and fall, and mother would call for David to stop over and help pick him up from off the floor.

Roger’s mind kept taking him back to the past, re-living those years as if they were today.

Our mother’s patience was tested day after day with her husband’s lack of understanding with what used to be so clear a few months ago.

Keeping Roger safe was a constant battle especially when he argued over and over to drive.  Taking away his keys emasculated a once proud man, and I don’t think Roger ever made peace with this loss.

Every now and then though Roger was his old self, when we’d catch these two holding hands on the coach from an unannounced visit, when their favorite TV spots were sitting on their Lazy Boy recliners.

The sun began to yawn during that long stretch of summer when Roger stopped showing an interest in food.  Never passing up a piece of pie before and now pushing away his heart’s desire, I knew we bid another painful good-bye.

As the sun went down, I even missed Roger’s annoyances when I came to clean for them.  I stopped finding his used handkerchiefs between the folds of the sofa which aggravated my sensitive stomach yet had me longing for the old Roger to return.

That remaining hours of this longest day of summer were the most grievous when Roger had to be placed in a new home away from our mother to receive the care we were no longer able to give.

The nurses would call our mother during the evening hours, lamenting the agony her husband was experiencing, pulling on the rails up and down the hallways from his wheelchair looking feverously for his wife, groaning from his deepest pain of abandonment and separation her name.
B R E N D A…

The heart remembers what our minds may forget.

For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks…
Matthew 12:34

David and I didn’t realize it at the time, but our visit with Roger after stopping by after an early church service would be our last.

Roger was still sleeping when we entered his room.

Not expecting to see a little boy in a grown man’s body, we could hardly contain our emotions.

The nurses stopped by and said they’d wake Roger up and get him dressed for a visit with us, for which we appreciated greatly that day.

Newly shaven and sporting a flannel shirt and pants, Roger looked like the man we had loved for so many years.

Trying to hold back the floodgate of our tears, a teenage Roger told us he was going fishing that day with his older brothers down by the creek.  Roger lit up like a kid in the candy store for the mere mention of his day.

Before he went to his brother’s though, Roger offered to pay for ice cream if we were willing to drive him there.

Oh, what the heart remembers what our minds may forget.

There was one final good-bye before the sun finally fell asleep during our longest day of summer, and that was good-bye to Roger himself.

You don’t realize the impact of someone’s life until they’re not with you anymore.

We sure loved Roger.  That day we as a family shared a meal in his honor at Broadway Café, their date night restaurant where they knew him by name.

I often wondered what my mother’s heart remembered about Roger while she lived her remaining days without him.

They grew old together for fifteen years of marriage.

Roger’s hospitality had been sorely missed when we visited mother after his leaving.

For me as Roger’s daughter by marriage, I thanked God for redeeming through Roger those small fatherly touches he poured into my cup when my earthly dad was unable to fill.

As a tribute to a man who loved my mother and her children thru the golden years, I leave these words that my heart will always remember.

WHAT’S IN A NAME
By Lori A. Alicea

In life we have a vision set,
Before our eyes we see.
Imagining the way we’d spend,
Our days with family.

Yet sometimes definitions change,
And words don’t mean the same.
The game of life we all must play,
The game, “What’s in a name?”

The name of father we all know,
The one who gives you life.
And married to your children’s mom,
The one, your wedded wife.

Yet father’s more than just a name,
Its meaning beyond dad.
It’s one who shares the day-to-day,
And part of memories had.

A father greets you in his way,
And wears his silly grin.
You at the door he must remind,
“Hey look, what cat’s drug in.”

A dad has hospitality,
And offers when you’re near,
He’ll offer many times beyond,
In case you didn’t hear.

We have a dad, though not our dad,
That game, what’s in a Name?
Yet love we feel because of you,
The meaning’s just the same.

A NEW DAY TO BEGIN AGAIN By Lori A Alicea

Every New Year opens up a brand-new journal of blank pages to allow God to write His story for you.

365 days in total…

365 opportunities to give God the pen…

365 new days to begin again…

There is great hope no matter what was written in pages past when we had the pen in our hand…

Because…

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23 RSV        

 As far back as I can remember I’ve been drawn to a ream of empty paper to unload my thoughts to, a hardback journal anxious for stories, a fresh blog to encourage those near and those I’ve never met.

Opening up old journals when I recorded those moments I dare not forget, recollections in good times and bad that I wanted to remember and pass onto my children and grandchildren for lessons learned, or a rope of survival to hold onto when days challenged our strength to endure.

 If truth be told though, and I was willing to allow you to see and read between the lines of dusty memories and select chapters as I knew them to be, you’d notice the handwriting and turn of events occurred with the pen in my hand, detouring my life because I wanted to write my story as I saw fit, instead of surrendering the pen and empty pages to the great story God has already written in His Master Plan for me.

Why do we fight for the pen?

Why do we struggle to hand over our empty pages when we know deep down…

As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
I
saiah 55:9 NIV

 In the library of our life there are those books we long to forget, those pages we wish never happened, those sentences we’re desperate to burn and forget in our remembrance, those stories we ask for understanding in our why’s which seem to go unanswered, at least in this lifetime.

Yet, take comfort in our great Redeemer, the faithful one who ensures the sun will rise and set for us without question, the same faithful one who…

Binds up the brokenhearted…

Proclaims freedom for the captives…

Comforts all who mourn and grieve…

Bestows on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes.

Bestows the oil of joy instead of mourning…

Bestows a garment of praise instead of a spirit of praise…
(Isaiah 61:1-3)

Today is a new day to begin again.

Today is a new day to realize the one who formed and knitted you in your mother’s womb is the same one and only one who could write your best story.

Surrender the pen…

Surrender the pages of your hopes, your dreams, your past, your failures, and pages of doing it your way, and let Him begin again to write what was meant for your life from before you were ever born.

Best sellers are written from the hands who know you best.

Surrender the pen…

Surrender the pages…

Get excited for a new day to begin again…

 Let God write your best story.

It’s a new day to remember you won’t regret the surrender.

WHEN THINGS DON’T GO AS PLANNED By Lori A Alicea

A holiday homecoming thirteen years in the waiting was finally becoming a reality.

All the way from Hawaii, our military son was flying into the airport one day before his family was driving to our doorstep on Christmas Eve 2023 after a stay with her family, and this Gaga and Papa could hardly contain their joy.

Since serving this great country and flag all these years, Christmas Day has always been seen thru the lens of technology with our military family.  Our four grandchildren have never been home for the holidays; and their only wish on their gift list every year since they remember was to wake up with their grandparents on Christmas morning.

A surprise we never saw coming was happening, and for a week and a half, our four beautiful grandchildren, Cova, Hollis, Rosalee and Kizzie Mae, would be eating at our kitchen table, sleeping in our beds, making memories with cousins they haven’t seen in years, meeting for the first time the newest cousin recently born just twelve months ago, and best of all, be a part of our Christmas pictures.

The list was endless of all we as a family were going to cram into such a short amount of time.  So many people to see; the places slated to go.  Our enthusiasm of finally experiencing Christmas together was fueling our energy and will.

Yet sadly, this Christmas of 2023 we wished for, we dreamed for, were plans only written on paper.

Sometimes things don’t go as planned.

 Life happens and has a way of changing its mind and direction when you least expect.

 When things don’t go as planned yet in your disappointments, you learn to squeeze every drop of those sour lemons and make the sweetest lemonade if you’re willing to press into the moments that test your plans on paper.

Our holiday homecoming scrapbook filled its first page at a cabin rented by our military son and daughter, so Papa and I, our daughter and son and their families could be under one roof for three full days without the hustle of coming and going to each other’s homes.  Aunts and uncles and other cousins were invited to share this place with us for all the festivities planned for Christmas Day and beyond, so we could be surrounded by a complete family for the first time in thirteen years.

The amenities of basketball, pool, and Ping-Pong in this picturesque cabin in the woods would foster relationships and challenge moms against dads, brother against sister, husbands against wives and cousins against each other with smores to celebrate the win.

   This grandmother’s heart overflowed as her children and grandchildren settled in for the evening in their matching pajamas, with good little boys and girls frosting their cookies for Santa making his way to their house for a midnight stop with gifts.

Christmas morning came soon enough with Gaga’s girls checking if the coast was clear to leave their beds, to look at all those presents lining the tree and stockings.  Yes, pretty girls, it’s time to get up and celebrate.

 After a biscuit and gravy breakfast that Christmas morning, an unexpected surprise in the window caught the eye of our grandchildren.  Evidently Santa forgot a few gifts and made a special trip to drop them off.

   Another page is turned in our holiday homecoming scrapbook.

An empty page waiting to be filled with another moment memorialized into a memory.

Those anticipated Christmas pictures this grandmother couldn’t wait to capture reveals a glimpse of our homecoming yet to be.

Our granddaughter Cova (pictured in back) was too sick to shower and wear her color coordinated dress; a smile was all she could give during that evening of Christmas dinner and presents.

Whatever our beautiful Cova had was shared with her cousins and aunts and uncles in the cabin as the unwanted Christmas gift that it was.

To be fair, I did have a cold on day one and could have been the gift giver to the family, but who knows.

 For the next week and a half, there were urgent care visits, sleeping children, medicine taking and a paper full of plans now cancelled; yet a spirit of still being present in the moment with each other prevailed, taking our sour lemons and serving the sweetest lemonade in our time spent together.

While the memo went out regarding our quarantined status, some family members took their chances to hug and kiss their nieces and nephews finally in person, instead of loving and missing them in videos.

A favorite uncle in the family stopped by and brought a ray of sunshine to our isolation of sadness.  Always sending a pair of pajamas to Hawaii each year for Christmas, the children happened to be wearing the gifts Uncle Charlie gave them last year.

Uncle Rob stopped by on a moment’s notice after Cova, now feeling better, called to see if she could have a sleepover with his kids.

The best friend of our son, who we adopted into our lives as our own, gave Cova and the rest of the family a sleepover to remember.

Bowling happened even if the kids only had enough energy for one game, while the parents took their place in the second.

Our nephew Adam and his family blessed us more than they know when they unexpectedly called to share a Winter Wonderland afternoon with us skating and sharing a meal.

Yes, it’s these moments of squeezing those sour lemons and being present and pressing through when the best memories are made.

Feeling like we were the only ones missing the Christmas we planned on paper; God reminds us that we aren’t alone.

At the skate park I met my dear friend and her daughters and their families who each came from out of town, yet experienced the same unfortunate gift giving as we did; and yet, they were smiling and pressing through for the moments and memories as we were.

The pages of our holiday homecoming are filling up with the unexpected surprises not planned on paper.

Our Hawaii babies haven’t seen snow for over five years, and God allowed it to snow.

Pajamas and all, these four received one of their heart’s desires and their smiles tell a great story.

Another page in the unplanned chapters of our holiday homecoming scrapbook was the special bond four little girls have enjoyed since they were conceived continue as if they have been next door neighbors and BFFs since their parents brought them home from the hospital.

Our daughters Candace and Crystal both were pregnant at the same time with Ayva and Rosalee, then two years later, pregnant again with Aubrey and Kizzie Mae; noting that both sets of girls were born weeks apart.

God’s plans always amaze me.

Seen through the lens of my camera, this grandmother begs the clock to slow down as her Hawaiian grandchildren are growing up way too fast.

Yet I love how time hasn’t changed the bond of three sisters.

One page of our holiday homecoming scrapbook makes me laugh because our Rosalee is the star of the page; our family comedian.

The newest addition to Rosalee’s life is her doll named Shelley after the aunt who gifted this doll, or should I say baby, at Christmas.

Rosalee is noted Mother of the Year for taking such good care of baby Shelley, giving us each babysitting duties in her absence.

I was even put in charge of dressing baby Shelley for her airplane ride with strict instructions of her outfit; nappy (diaper), onesie, outfit, socks and pacifier.  Rosalee is one determined mother in waiting.

   Probably the bittersweet pages of our holiday homecoming scrapbook were missing the Alicea New Year’s Eve get-together which gathers all the aunts, uncles and cousins under one roof for a hilarious time of eating, games and presents together.

While we still gathered ourselves for pizza around the table, we kept thinking about all those we wouldn’t get to see and the traditions our Hawaii grandchildren wouldn’t get to experience when things didn’t go as planned.

  Our Hawaii grandchildren wouldn’t get to honor their great-grandfather celebrating his 90th birthday.

They wouldn’t get to laugh and see their Uncle Nathan making his yearly appearance as some odd goofball off the streets.  Nathan has earned an Academy Award in the cast of characters he plays on New Year’s Eve each year.

But most of all and sadly for this grandmother, our Hawaii grandchildren didn’t get to reunite and make their memories with the remaining five cousins; noting most of all, didn’t get to update this picture from their last time all together.

 

The hardest page to fill was our final morning together.

We went to bed the night before with heavy hearts knowing good-byes were coming, yet we fought the tears and reality of life with them apart from us.

I woke up to an innocent moment of six-year-old Kizzie Mae with her arm Papa still in her pajamas; would have loved to listen in on their conversation.

Hollis was seen wrapping his arms around Papa at the front door not wanting to let go.
Hollis caught me off guard in our last hug together at the airport when he genuinely spoke from a little boy’s heart, “Gaga, thank you for the Christmas dinner, it was so delicious.”

Why would a ten-year-old boy think to remember such a memory with all the gifts he packed away in his luggage?

I believe God was wrapping our holiday homecoming in a bow, remembering what was most important, time well spent around the table together.

Arriving home after leaving our Hawaii babies at the airport, I posted these words on social media; it captures the raw feelings from a Papa and Gaga’s heart in their good-byes; I leave these words with you…

 

Papa and I just left a big part of our heart at the airport.  Good-byes are so hard when you know your next hello will be many months from now.  Such is the life in the military.

Having Jake, Crystal and our four grandchildren home for the holidays was the best gift ever; one we will cherish in our hearts for a lifetime.

Thank you, kids, for the financial sacrifice to make the trip, rent the Airbnb, and all the extras.  May your generosity be returned to you in abundance.

Papa and I have returned from the airport to an empty house void of their Hawaiian babies.  Their sweet smells are still in the air.  Their voices are still baked in the walls.

Our hearts are heavy, and we’ve already had our first cry, but we rejoice for the memories.

While it wasn’t the Christmas we planned on paper, we were all together which filled our hearts to overflow.

BE THE LIGHT IN THEIR WINDOW By Lori A Alicea

The Christmas calendar has been full this year.

Photo by Any Lane on Pexels.com

The month of December has penciled in those annual traditions we look forward to while making room for new ideas with the younger generations joining our festivities.

Photo by Kaboompics .com on Pexels.com

Entering the final week of the holiday, my husband and I purpose to find a place of stillness and gratitude away from the busyness, to reflect and reminisce on the amazing life God has blessed us with by watching as we do every year,

It’s a Wonderful Life.

Photo by Jeswin Thomas on Pexels.com

Earlier that morning, I felt God’s prompting to watch this old classic, and when my husband suggested it later in the evening, I knew there was a message God wanted me to catch.

A message just minutes into the movie…

 Excerpt from…

IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE
Produced and directed by Frank Capra

Senior Angel:  A man down on Earth (named George) needs our help.

Angel Second class:  Is he sick?

Senior Angel:  No, worse.  He’s discouraged.

This scene gripped my attention instantly as I have crossed paths with a few strangers appearing deeply discouraged during the Christmas season.

Photo by Andrew Nevins on Pexels.com

Making casual conversation at the grocery checkout inquiring of the cashier’s holiday progress, my heart was saddened to hear she cancelled Christmas with her adult children and grandchildren due to a lack of funds.

Visiting the library, I overheard a man speaking loudly how he will be wearing a fake smile during Christmas so others can’t see how miserable he is.

All this pain…

All this discouragement…

We’ve each found ourselves at some point in our life in the ditches of discouragement, haven’t we?

When the unexpected happens, when we’re taken off guard, when life doesn’t go as planned, discouragement has an opportunity to take root if allowed.

Discouragement is void of courage, hope or confidence.

In scripture we are reminded to be…

Strong and courageous…
Be not afraid…
For the Lord your God is with us…
He will not fail or forsake us…
(1Chronicles 28:20)

Sometimes discouragement is overwhelming though, especially during the holidays.

George from It’s a Wonderful Life was deeply distraught and discouraged, so much so that the Senior Angel was quoted…

At exactly 10:45 pm Earth time, that man will be thinking seriously about throwing away God’s greatest gift.

All because of money…

Wishing he had never been born, George gets a gift, he gets a glimpse of a world void of his life.

It didn’t take long for George to realize the sad change of events and paths that took place in his loved one’s lives, because George hadn’t been there to impact and influence them for good.  George begged to return to his life.

God hovers close to those in discouragement and sends the encouragers; He dispatches a circle of friends.

At the climax of It’s a Wonderful Life,

It was George’s friends, all those lives George was generous to, showed kindness to, he himself was a friend to, who reciprocated the generosity and saved a fateful day from George.

The Angel Second Class said it best:

 No man is a failure who has friends.

 I haven’t been able to get the man at the library out of my mind; the sad soul who will be wearing a fake smile during Christmas so others can’t see how miserable he is.

This pains me and I’ve prayed for God to send the encouragers, to dispatch a circle of friends to be the light in his window of hope.

We still have a few days before Christmas.

Oh, that our hearts have room for those who hurt this holiday season.

Oh, that our Christmas lists have room at the top for an unexpected assignment to a friend unknowingly in need.
Oh, that we long to be a bright light for Jesus in the window of hope for those deeply discouraged this Christmas.

Photo by Rene Asmussen on Pexels.com

FINISHING OUR RACE By Lori A Alicea

On January 1, 2023, races of all kinds were ready to begin.

Eleven months ago, there were crowds of runners thousand’s deep at the marathon’s line up anxiously waiting with bated breath to hear the firing of the Starter’s gun for their wave’s official start.

26.2 grueling miles to be conquered one step in front of the other, with arms pumping, swinging back and forth to set their pace and momentum towards and over the finish line.

 Cheers and roars from spectators already located along every mile of the race while holding signs of encouragement for their loved one bibbed and laced up raised the decibel level to a rock concert on their world’s tour.

Yes, on January 1, 2023, packs of runners positioned in their lane and ready to engage in the battle of mental toughness not for the faint of heart.

A race to…

Lose weight…

Start a business…

Start a fitness plan…

Train for a marathon…

Write a book…

Whatever the race, each athlete was off and running towards the prize of the finish line.
Jake running
We’ve all laced up our shoes at the first of the year at least once in our lives, haven’t we?

At the stroke of midnight welcoming in a brand-new calendar of 365 days and a fresh slate to begin again, we’ve uttered those words even if under our breath, this year is going to be different.

We enter the marathon of 26.2 miles again yet summiting this mountain seems possible and within our grasp.
Day 16 RunningWe’re going to triumph and finally claim our medal this time.

Yet, when the running begins and miles beyond the starting line, the pain of why we didn’t finish the last time floods our memory; the mountains we dare to summit face us again.

For me, my race is writing a book.

While faithful to the pen of blogging these past five years, the hardback journal re-telling the season of rejection in my younger life has yet to cross the finish line, although the highlights became a three-part series earlier this summer and since, have passed the half-way mark of my race this month of December.

WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME? By Lori A Alicea (Part 1-3)

But thankfully, God sends those cheerleaders to train, to inspire, to run with you along those miles when another step, another roadblock begs you to quit.

My niece Angie has entered her own race of authoring a book and the shouts and bellringing from those spectators cheering her from around the final bend to the finish line is a blaring song of victory in my ears heard ever so clearly from my position on the course miles back.

Yet, in spite of the miles ahead of me, my niece looks back to find me, to send with her eyes that look of not quitting, to pass the baton of encouragement to her aunt with these words…

Niece Angie Miller in her own words…

Our greatest battle of warfare is the battle of crossing or passing the half-way point or mark of resistance in our attempt to accomplish our assignment.

 The battle is not at the beginning but is found after the half-way mark in accomplishing the assignment.  Don’t let the vision die or be put away.  The enemy doesn’t want us to finish what God has placed in our heart for the kingdom of God.  Let’s encourage one another to push through.

 Isaiah 42:4 says, “We will not fail nor be discouraged till our mission is completed.”

 In spite of the obstacles, difficulties, pain or headache that are presented before us, choose to focus on the finish line instead of what’s stopping us from getting there!

 Angie’s willingness to lock arms with another runner highlights the heart of a leader as once quoted by Author and Leader John Maxwell…

Leaders never cross the finish line first.
People who cross the finish line first are running alone.
When leaders come across the finish line, they are bringing others with them.

My niece’s battle cry to pick myself up and continue running, to break through the mental wall and get my second wind to complete my race of writing was a reminder from…

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURES
SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURES

 Danny Chambers; Pastor and Teacher who said it best…

We are not recognized, remembered or rewarded for the things we START in life…
Only the things we FINISH!
KYLE medal turkey trot race
The close of 2023 is mere weeks away and I’m still running, I’m still writing, but the finish line must be close as the rock concert of spectators is cheering ever so loudly for my encouragement.

For those of you still in the lane of your races, keep going; keep persevering as I want to take you also over the finish line with me.